If you post a photo of you and your kid as your main profile pic, you are 95% more likely to be passed over for your equal counterpart who DOES NOT have their child in their profile pic with them. Are those odds enough for your sugar sluts to relieve your profiles of those photos? I sure hope so.

I mean, do you want to experience the world of Seeking SugarDaddies relationships or not? If you do, opt for those photos which hone in your own fucky prowess and keep the kid-friendly ones in their proper photo albums or scrap-book. Oh, and if you do “scrap-book”, I wouldn’t tell anyone that.

Now, for the moment you’ve all been waiting for… Sugar profiles exposed!! I gathered the most recent sugar sluts with kiddie profiles to share with you… so, you’re welcome and enjoy!

Sugar Sugar Profiles Exposed!!

I like to call this one: Welcome to Disturbia.

As a sugar baby looking for a Seeking SugarDaddies, this pic is all wrong. Cute baby, wrong venue. Not so cute mama, terrible tongue piercing. Got it? Sheesh!

I like to call this one: Monkey See, Mommy Do.

Just because your baby likes you does not mean that Seeking SugarDaddies will like you, and showing a photo of your baby finding you amusing won’t convince anyone you actually are, amusing that is.

I like to call this one: Nice Tits, Kid.

If you’re going to have your tits out and stuff, and least crop your kid out of your photo, seriously. It really feels strange to ogle your large and in charge breasts only to see your kid in the shot, ew.

I like to call this one: Who’s Your Audience and What Does that Mean?

Think about it, who is looking at your profile? You want another baby daddy, sugar babe? Then go to findasugardaddyformybaby.com, then insert fingers into throat and puke because that’s all you got now.

I like to call this one: Who’s Your Daddy?

This one just creeps me out, who is this kid? And what is is mom thinking by putting him out there like this? Oh, and apparently sugar babes are getting older, sugar daddies getting younger.

The thing to think about when choosing photos for your Seeking SugarDaddies relationships escapades is, if I were a Seeking SugarDaddies, would I find that attractive? Answer: You can never know what it feels like to be a Seeking SugarDaddies, so your answer is always no. No you would not find that attractive and no you won’t be a Seeking SugarDaddies anytime soon. Did you want to say “yes” to either? Be sure to check out chickswithdicks.com for more details regarding the relationships lifestyle to fit your needs.

I’m jus’ sayin’, eloquently I’m sure.

Note: There is a poll embedded within this post, please visit the site to participate in this post’s poll.

Before There Was Sugar Sugar

Are you aggressive? Do you use strong words to convey what you are looking for? As part of a daily occurrence, I came across some awesome profiles! Amazing photos and words I thought I’d share with you. They are WHAT NOT TO DO– thanks for letting me get that out, no more caps, I promise. The following profile excerpts are what not to do and why: (Oh, and to turn this blog into a drinking game, every time someone says “fun“– you must take a drink… I promise the article will be funnier too)

NSA Seeking SugarDaddies John

“Bought out by major auto company. Got a part time job for fun. Like golf, skating ,keeping busy. Not a fat ass or pervert or wierdo, just a little shy I guess. I’m thinkin’ maybe drop by or get together a couple times a month or so. 100 bucks an hour for an hour , maybe 2. Have a cocktail, fool around, a little fuck, fun and then just go on your way.”

Wow, what a romantic…

That’s Basically It Sugar Baby

“I Love to sing, dance and Laugh and have fun … I also like fashion & switching up my hair styles.. Last But Not Least I’m a Certifed Phlebotomist.. And that’s Basically it..”

That’s basically it? Well, that’s not very interesting. What is going on with this sugar baby’s photo? That may be the ultimate in unflattering photo angles.

Sugar Baby Means Business

“.people say i look like Julia styles, funny we share the same birth fuck shes 3 years older yet no relation. small world huh. I am going to be blunt cuz its what i do best …..i need to get on my own two feet and i need some help getting there. I am smart and cut through bullshit like a hot knife through butter. I can be your best friend or your worst enemy but i stand my ground and do what i need to do to survive. I am looking for a plutonic financial helper…the rewards are great  i am a great dinner guest fun and someone to spend time with ….if your looking for fun and someone to fuck wrong gal not into it for this not going to happen. I need a temporary helper one whome can get me where i need to be, i am a great companion and will have you on the floor laughing if you have a good sence of humor. Ill say it like this the economy sucks, and i need help to get what i need done done. i need a helper whose willing to pay me for my time….not services i will not sell my body my mind or soul its already taken. i need a temp arrangement where its plutonic and mutually agreed. what i am willing to offer in return for money is the following. a plutonic dinner guest for fun, a house sitter/cleaner. someone who can make you laugh and smile and be everything you want in a girl , just no fuck no action sorry gentleman with all do respect i prize my body and its not up for sale.”

I’m glad she’s looking for a plutonic helper, a temp plutonic helper, a temp arrangement. Just don’t fuck with her, or fuck her, either way, she’ll cut you like a hot knife through butter!

Homeless With a Computer and a Plan

“got out a bad relationship ex beat me and wouldn’t let me have anything so am on the streets with nothing and no money.”

Ahem– and a baby?!? I’m speechless.

Brunette Sugar Baby Wants

This came straight from the horses mouth:

“iam a simple girl smart ,comique ,romantic and very honest

and i love people

i can do my best for help people and have fun

mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

alot of things and i dont want describe it

im a brunette who likes to have funn and i can b a real bitch if you cross me

call me when needed  have fun pay me n never forget ur day”

Does anyone know what’s going on in this photo, what does it even say about this sugar baby? Anyone? Anyone? Yes, it simply states that she doesn’t give a shit and doesn’t want you to either.

No Strings Attached to Anything SB

Oh yeah– that’s a real photo. A really bad photo of a sugar baby… I think.

“NO fuck!!! OF ANY TYPE… I am willing to give my time and effort to make you happy though. so yeah if you are interested in fun email me.
im nice and sweet and kind but can get mean when stepping on my toes… I’m a very lovely woman and a queen and wants to be treated like one!!!”

Another Great Profile

“In my free time, I’m always reading new textbooks (I’m a dork!) or working out and having fun, which I do every weekday. Any other time is spent working as a technician or acting or singing. I’m a natural mezzo-soprano and I love to sing Christmas carols and have fun

Does this rag smell like chloroform to you?”

Nice. Have fun.

Note: There is a poll embedded within this post, please visit the site to participate in this post’s poll.

Even though these men aren’t technically daddies to these young women, they spoil, pamper and indulge them – thus giving them their fashionable title: Sugar Daddies.

Celebrities aren’t exempt from the “robbing the cradle” syndrome. With celebrities like Kelsey Grammer and Charlie Sheen trending their indulgent relationships with women eons younger, top sugar relationships site, SugarSugar.com has compiled a list of the Top 10 Celebrity Sugar Daddies of the Century. From legendary actors to billionaire moguls and mongrels, these men are notorious for their hunger and appetite for young, vivacious females…

Hugh Hefner – The self proclaimed and perpetuated #1 Seeking SugarDaddies of all time, 84 year-old playboy Hugh Hefner has an arsenal and collection of Sugar sluts, all locked away in his mansion.  The mogul (and sometimes mongrel) recently popped the question to 24 year-old Crystal Harris.

Donald Trump – Affectionately known as “The Donald”, but I prefer to calling him, “The Don”, this billionaire is nearly 25 years older than his wife Melania Knauss-Trump. Good thing she doesn’t mind the golden feathers on top!

Charlie Sheen – When you make $1.5 million per episode of Two and a Half Men, you’re able to splurge on things like beautiful young porn stars, drugs, lavish hotel parties with strippers., and more drugs. Just ask the MaSheen, duh- WINNING!

Mick Jagger – World renowned for his large gaping mouth and string of affairs, this rock legend has several children by multiple sugar-baby-baby’s mamas. He still Can’t get no satisfaction?

Tiger Woods – Young to the Seeking SugarDaddies industry, second to golf. This white-balled superstar is a Seeking SugarDaddies on the rise, recently ending his marriage, paying millions of dollars for it, and coming to a night hot spot near you!

Tiki Barber – Giants football legend, Tiki Barber, left his pregnant wife of 11 years for a much younger and blonder intern at a TV station where he was employed. Messed up his life? Well, he is talking about returning to the grid from retirement..

William Randolph Hearst – Possibly one of the earliest recorded practitioners of the Seeking SugarDaddies movement, this media mogul openly lived with his 21 year-old mistress, hear that? Openly

Woody Allen – Perhaps one of the most notorious Sugar Daddies, this film icon married his *daughter, Soon-Yi Previn, giving Seeking SugarDaddies a more appropriate meaning.*Adopted daughter…but still!

Kelsey Grammer – This TV marvel certainly has a way with women. His engagement to 24 year-old Kate Walsh landed him an offer as SugarSugar.com spokesperson.

John F. Kennedy – Charming, rich and powerful, it has been reported that this former US President had affairs with numerous young women including White House workers, Gangsters’ girlfriends, staff members, reporters, and Movie stars.

Note: There is a poll embedded within this post, please visit the site to participate in this post’s poll.

As fucky sugar baby co-eds know, Spring Break means one thing, PARTY!!

Looking to do something special for your sugar baby du jour on her Spring Break? Take it from me, your fucky co-ed wants a wee-bit more than a dinner out to satisfy her carnal, (scratch that), expensive and peculiar needs.

I have one question for you wannabe sugar daddies:

Do you have what it takes?

Review this checklist to see if you are ready to show your co-ed the time of her life for Spring Break!!

Do you plan on, or are you currently (for the week of Spring Break):

• Equipped. Having enough dough to line the inside of, and fill your Bentley (or Chrysler equivalent)

• Able to possess the energy and ability to go at it, in the bedroom or otherwise– All night, all day, or not at all, (if your sugar baby co-ed refrains from being anywhere near your *old saggy balls)

• Taking time out of your big-boy work schedule to cater to the unwavering needs of your attention-starved sugar baby for one whole week

• Unattached. Or at least unattached enough to turn off your electronic device, the one fielding calls from your wife or worse, other women. If you’ve never experienced jealousy from a sugar baby co-ed, now is not the time. Trust me…

• In-shape, or have the appearance of being in-shape. Co-eds can talk a mile a minute, walk a mile a minute, and shop even faster– You’re gonna want to keep up!

• Have an emergency fund and escape route planned. You don’t want to be left high and dry if your co-ed turns out to be a vicious monster cloaked in candy-coated fuckiness

• Cool and confident. Desperation doesn’t look good on you either, Seeking SugarDaddies! If you aren’t confident in yourself as a man, then pretend, please, for the love of God. Seasoned sugar sluts, co-ed or not, can sense insecurity like they can spot  a juicy couture track-suit.

Now that we got that out of the way, let’s get to the good stuff…

What to do with your fucky sugar baby during Spring Break is purely up to you. Lost for ideas? Here are a few which have been beta-tested and approved by other sugar sluts:

• Role-play. Install dungeon-like apparatuses and lock her up in your mansion as your slave. Feed her what you want, when you want, and make fuck with her when she least expects it. When your done, throw her a bone and take her shopping for being a good sport.

• Get away. Take your fucky co-ed to her favorite exotic location or your favorite quiet one. Creep out or impress your sugar baby with your magic boy scout skills. Whittle a handbag out of a stump or hunt to kill a dozen Meerkats for a shrug, not an elephant for sport, (death in the name of fashion can be seen as couth).

• Sunbathe. Beach abode or pool-side retreat, fucky co-eds worship the sun, now it’s time for them to worship you! Provide your fucky co-ed with a sunny-side up break and she’ll bask in the glory of being 10 shades darker than all her friends.

• Mexico. What happens there, stays there, everyone knows that! Use the tool of discretion to your advantage by taking advantage, AND spend much less money shopping, (you can still impress your sugar baby by dropping millions of pesos)

You are armed with the knowledge of how to show your fucky co-ed sugar baby a great time during spring break while avoiding common mistakes other sugar daddies make.

Build it and they will cum.

Like magic grow toys being 6000x their size with water, watch your sugar baby do the same with monetary gifts!

Set the stage for a sugar baby to succeed and she will go wild!!

I ranted about Z to her for a few, let the frustration out, and then went on to catch up with her. It’d been a while since we saw each other, shoot, since we even talked! I think I saw her last September, and last we spoke, she was on her way to meet a pot SD out of town. Well as it turned out, she never left and is having all of her things moved to her in the next few days!

She discovered a sugar baby life for herself in her new location. She has a few sugar daddies who fly into town to see her, and the rest of the time, she’s working on re-building her old business! Almost 3 years ago, she had to sell her business because of the start of the recession.

The line of work she was in was the first to go with the rise of economic difficulty on Wall Street. With the closing of the business’ doors, she chose the option to fuck older men with money. She took it, and from it, business opportunity. She has been relationships wealthy older men since. It’s been almost 3 years since she closed the doors to her business and started Seeking SugarDaddies relationships. She’s the one who got me into this sugar baby gig in the first place.

Right now, between relationships sugar daddies and other side gigs, she makes about $15,000 a month

Her personal overhead and expenses are approx. $10,000 a month

That leaves her with an additional $5000 or so to invest or play with!

She’s doing alright I’d say. Not that she’s the average for any sugar baby though, she’s quite the opposite! She’s always had particularly good taste in rich men to help her, and bad taste in men to fall in love with, (I tell her this all the time).

The thing about my girlfriend is that she’s not as materialistic as you might think. I mean, she loves a designer handbag like the rest of us, but her outlook in the past 10 years I’ve known her has always been positive and geared toward the well-being of her family.

She had to scrape the bottom of barrel to pay her share of bills, but she always did it knowing she wanted more for herself. She’s a resilient and hard-working woman who just happened to need a helping hand at times. Nothing was beneath her when it came to showing up, putting in a day’s work, and doing so with a smile on her face.

I guess I’m just in awe of a sugar baby with such spirit and gumption, I wish we all were so inclined to have that sort of candor.

I’m going to visit her at her new 5400 sq. ft. home soon I hope, and will bring back with me, many stories of our adventure!

Note: There is a poll embedded within this post, please visit the site to participate in this post’s poll.

I had my meeting with pot Seeking SugarDaddies Z to discuss the possible arrangement he and I could have in the future. That’s the thing with these Seeking SugarDaddies relationships meetings– you just have to have em! I met this one through sugarsugar.

He narrowed down the specifics of what he wanted: a part-time GFE (with potential for more) and blow-jobs.

So… neither of his needs would be an issue for me to fulfill, I just had to see whether or not he could satisfy mine.

I curtly smiled at his requests (thinking of how dreadfully easy they were), stopped, and waited for him to inquire about my needs in an arrangement. I gently touched his knee when I leaned in to tell him what I wanted. I whispered into his ear:

“I would love to do that for you and more, but I’m going to need a little breathing room to make that happen”, then I sat back gingerly and waited for his response.

“I’m sure we can work something out,” Z said ever so matter-of-factly. He reached into his murse (man-purse) and pulled out a white nondescript envelope and put it on the table. We were in a Coffee Bean so white envelopes passing over these tables happened quite often and was not unusual.

“This is for your time,” Seeking SugarDaddies Z said, “I will take care of some of the bills you have, and please let me know if you need anything else baby.”

This was too easy—it never happens like that! Seeking SugarDaddies tells you his needs, sugar baby tells him her needs, and all are welcomed and met simultaneously..

I started to get a little turned on by the ease of the situation and hot with desire. My lips must have been flushed because I started to feel hot all over and Z noticed. I haven’t known him long but I can tell when he gets turned on, besides the hard bulge in his pants, I mean. Which there was– a bulge in his pants, that is…

We took the rest of the afternoon off to rumple the sheets. When I went home that evening, I looked in the envelope and discovered $500. Not bad, considering I had some of the best fuck I’ve ever had and will again! Plus, he didn’t think the blow job was bad either–

The thing with Seeking SugarDaddies relationships, mutual arrangements, and NSA connections is that they represent the best parts of relationships, the good stuff, the sweet stuff.

Sound too good to be true? It’s not. It’s a way of life, people gravitate toward it because — well who wouldn’t want all of the good parts of a relationship and none of the bad? (Are you scratching your head to ponder that?)

I compiled a list of reasons why sugar daddies choose a mutually beneficial relationship and why you should too! Here are great reasons to be a Seeking SugarDaddies:

20. Bitches just ain’t worth the time anymore

19. Your last girlfriend/wife left you for someone more successful than you

18. You despise or are allergic to commitment

17. You will rule the world

16. Everyone around you will be envious and jealous

15. Other men will wonder what your secret is– don’t tell them

14. Think about it, man cave, 24/7/365

13. Gorgeous women will tell you you’re hot, even if you’re not

12. R-e-s-p-e-c-t, you’re doing what all men dream of doing

11. Other men look up to you

10. More women will want to fuck you

9. Hotter women will want to fuck you

8. Sugar sluts do what their told, well, most of the time

7. You can finally feel like you’re Charlie Sheen. The winning Charlie Sheen

6. Sugar sluts will try hard to look good for you at all times

5. Sugar sluts will go home when you want them to

4. You don’t have to be rich- just generous with what you have

3. No more arguments about how fat she looks, your wandering eyes, or who the other woman is

2. A greater possibility of being in a threesome– if you’re into that sort of thing

1. Amazing fuck with uninhibited sugar sluts– and more of it!

Note: Sugar daddies beware, there are some sugar sluts under the impression that they can be your no-fuck platonic friend and you will buy them things.

What, their personalities and company are that amazing?!? Yeah right, maybe if you’re a 10!

Note: There is a poll embedded within this post, please visit the site to participate in this post’s poll.

Like everyone else, I’ve been enjoying your recent media appearances. But for different reasons. While others are glued to the tabloids thinking they see a man self-immolating his life and career, I believe I’m watching a man become a role model for millions of other men who, though socially obligated to deny it, are gut-wrenchingly envious of the life you lead.

“Most men lead lives of quiet desperation and go to the grave with the song still in them.” -Thoreau

It’s a shame so many men feel forced to deny themselves the pursuit of happiness. Though happiness is defined differently by each individual – financial success, self-worth, creative expression – the common foundation is our appetite for women. Having the interest of a beautiful woman bolsters our confidence, positions us in society, and offers opportunities to creatively explore our fuckual instincts.

I’ve seen timid, unexceptional males become self-assured, world-stomping supermen through the power of, frankly, knowing they can have any woman they want.  And my personal projects, SugarSugar.com and FinancialArrangement.com, facilitate men doing just that.

While I’m sure you’re aware of sites that offer similar services, mine are different because they are informed by my own experiences overcoming the cultural expectations surrounding male-female interaction, and becoming a fulfilled individual on my own terms. I’m not particularly concerned with the financial prospects for them – I only want to help others enjoy what I’ve found, and what I perceive you discovered long ago: the path to happiness.

I don’t have an ulterior agenda for this letter. I have nothing to offer that you don’t already have ready access to. I only suggest that if you agree with my cause, and are willing (some might say crazy) enough to support it, I would be thrilled to work with you in any capacity to help men of all stature enjoy even a fraction of what you have created for yourself.

I hope this letter finds you with continued success. The quiet millions are behind you.

Very sincerely,

Paul Madison

Founder, SugarSugar.com/FinancialArrangement.com

I went out with a pot SD for the second time on Sunday night and had a rather scandalist evening!

I try to remain friendly with most of my ex-SDs, I keep them at arm’s length anyway, so if I happen to run into one whilst out with another, nothing gets too uncomfortable. It’s proven to be a smart move thus far because some long-past SDs have seen me out with another SD, then called me to go out soon after. Seeing me had reminded them how cool they thought I was…

Clean breaks, no hard feelings, everyone wins– right?

Sunday night was the exception. So this newer pot SD took me to dinner…

Side Note: This man is still just a pot because while we’ve discussed that we want similar things from an arrangement, he hasn’t quite committed, though a handbag was bought by way of his cc as a sort of sugar-baby retainer.

…Yes, dinner. A great little place in downtown Phx…

Great wine?

Check.

Great food?

Absolutely.

Hefty bill taken care of by SD?

Done and done (thank you very much)

So, this SD (we’ll dub him Z until he makes an impression) kept telling me he had a surprise after dinner. Post vino and eats, we got into his classic Merc in mint condition (I absolutely luve cars like that!!), and he whisked me off to the next unknown destination!

Apparently this SD listens—because the surprise destination was to see a show, a band I’ve really been into! I don’t even think he’d ever listened to their music! Woo-hoo!

Upon arrival, getting out of the merc in my adorable little outfit, there in my periphery I saw my last crazy SD—the one exception to the rule of staying on good terms! Yikes—luckily, Z loves the school marm look, so as I was sporting my new Persols, I could fuss with them enough to give the illusion of not making eye contact or seeing my crazy ex-SD.

So this last SD, the dentist, is a weirdo with a capital C (the creepster, I’ll tell you more about him at a later fuck)!

There the dentist was, eerily close to us as we tried to enjoy the show, I didn’t want to leave my fuck alone! But before my bladder was about to explode, (not a good impression), I excused myself to the restroom and the dentist followed me.

Just as I was about to lock the one-stall bathroom, he barged through, pressed me up against the cold tile like he was either going to fuck or kill me, and asked me what I was thinking by being there! Eww yuck, he smelled like sweat as I remembered he did.

I found that with the dentist, I have to remain calm and silent—no response, and he usually walks away angry, but I walk away unscathed.

So I didn’t respond (or even think about how he smelled so I wouldn’t lose my meal) he gave my throat a good squeeze and left the bathroom.

I exited the water closet and joined Z for the rest of the amazing, albeit my mind was elsewhere, show… The dentist had, lucky for me, left before I returned to Z so I didn’t have the look of fear about me.

I’ve dealt with the dentist before, and had to wear scarves after close encounters with his grip so I know the drill. Z never questioned my stall adventure and I never let on, the pot SD would think I was the problem for sure! Charlie Sheen and his goddesses are a great example of a scandalous arrangement, full of crazy and blame.

I have another fuck with Z this week for a “talk” (why do they always have to preface uncomfortable talks as “talks”) to discuss our future arrangement. Stupid dentists.

With all the buzz and excitement of the earthquake in Japan, Seeking SugarDaddies Charlie Sheen and his sugar baby goddesses, Lindsay Lohan’s impending court case is falling a little on the importance scale.

As Lindsay, not a self-proclaimed sugar baby, faces felony grand theft charges, I can’t help but wonder where her Seeking SugarDaddies is. I mean, aside from her real daddy, her really weird daddy, doesn’t she have some knight in shining armor to come through for her? Or is she just so miserable as a person, much less a sugar baby, that no one is interested in giving her the pleasure?

In the world of Seeking SugarDaddies relationships, looks are important (way more important than in traditional relationships). Does Lindsay Lohan even measure up against the droves of gorgeous sugar sluts trying to get their piece of the pie? I don’t know, I’m not a Seeking SugarDaddies, but if I was (hypothetical), would I be Lindsay Lohan’s Seeking SugarDaddies? I guess I’d have to get to know her first– or at least pay for the assurance of her not acting like a blundering drunk if I took her out.

I’d probably make her wear panties for the first half of the night (does the carpet match the curtain? Wait, there’d better not be carpet ladies!)

If you were a Seeking SugarDaddies, would you consider Lindsay Lohan? Or is Bree Olson or Kacey Jordan more your style?

Note: There is a poll embedded within this post, please visit the site to participate in this post’s poll.